Today I want to talk about a concept that can be used for both good and evil…
So I’ll just come out up front with a little disclaimer. Don’t use this for evil. Okay?
It’s up to you to ensure that everything you do — especially when it comes to applying a particularly powerful persuasion strategy — is ethical, and is the right thing to do.
I like to follow a modified version of the golden rule: “Treat others the best way I want to be treated.” I also try to make sure that the world is full of more truth, beauty, and goodness as a result of me being here. I encourage you to do the same.
When those two approaches filter down into what I choose to sell, and how I choose to market, it does give me leeway.
If I have something that will make my prospect’s life better, it’s actually in their best interests for me to use every tool at my disposal — especially the most powerful ones — to move them toward action. To do anything less would be to do them a disservice.
Jay Abraham has a similar approach, built into his Strategy of Preeminence. In short, when you know you have the best possible option for your prospect (though creating an excellent product or service, and qualifying your prospects for fit), it’s actually your ethical imperative to do everything possible to sell it to them. This changes selling a bit, doesn’t it?
At the risk of going on any further of a tangent, I’ll just assume from here forward that you’re going to apply this at only the highest level of ethical standard.
“The Gap” — One of the most motivating forces in human psychology…
Take a look at these juxtapositions:
Who we are — who we want to be.
What we have — what we desire having.
Our problem — the solution.
Our desires — fulfillment.
Our mediocre present — our ideal future.
In each juxtaposition above, the dash represents “The Gap.” It’s a space between a problem and its solution, a desire and its fulfillment. It’s The Gap between who we see ourselves as today, and who we wish to become.
It can be about having things. It can be about being a better version of ourselves. It can be about who we wish to be in our relationships.
There’s almost no limit to where The Gap can exist.
It’s merely the difference or space between our present reality and an imagined better future.
And the more acutely we focus on, think about, and live in The Gap, the more we suffer. Yes, suffer.
I’m going to talk about it from this perspective first, then we’ll get into the marketing and selling implications.
What does The Gap have to do with suffering and mental health?
I’ve mentioned before that I’ve studied Buddhism a bit.
The first two of Buddhism’s Four Noble Truths are that 1) all existence is suffering, and 2) suffering comes from craving and attachment to something that is not real.
Sound like The Gap?
It is.
The more you choose to define your happiness by whether or not you have what’s on the other side of The Gap, the more you’ll suffer.
This is part of why straight consumerism can feel so empty. Buying things to feel the joy of buying things is a fickle pleasure. Yes, it can give us a little endorphin rush in the moment. But it doesn’t provide long term satisfaction or peace. (This is a really freaking hard lesson to teach your kids, by the way.)
Because it’s all about getting joy from closing The Gap. But that’s like getting joy from being a traveler who is only happy when they get to what they saw on the horizon. Every time you get to one destination, there’s a new horizon, with a new destination evident.
There’s nothing wrong with The Gap. It’s actually how humans have created so many incredible things that make our lives better today.
For example, once upon a time, a human said, “I want an easier way to move this heavy thing.” There was a problem. And a desired solution. And a Gap in between. And when they created a wheel, The Gap was closed, and humanity was made forever more mobile and capable of moving things.
The process of closing The Gap — going on the journey, solving the problems — can actually bring more joy than having The Gap closed. And again, there’s nothing wrong with closing The Gap.
The problem comes when you feel that you can’t be happy until The Gap is closed. That’s craving and attachment, and that’s what causes suffering.
But again: it’s also the human condition. It’s almost as if we’re wired to WANT a Gap.
We give our lives meaning based on having a Gap, and closing it. On making progress toward that Gap. And since I’m not just talking about you and me, but everyone including your prospects (unless you sell only to enlightened beings), then you should at least be aware of the role in The Gap in marketing.
Which brings us around to The Gap, and its role in marketing and selling…
Let’s start this part with a quote from the late, great Eugene Schwartz, in his book, Breakthrough Advertising.
“Let’s get right down to the heart of the matter. The power, the force, the overwhelming urge to own that makes advertising work, comes from the market itself, and not from the copy. Copy cannot create desire for a product. It can only take the hopes, dreams, fears and desires that already exist in the hearts of millions of people, and focus those already-existing desires onto a particular product. This is the copy writer’s task: not to create this mass desire — but to channel and direct it.”
Your prospects are feeling The Gap right now.
They have a problem in their life. Or, if not a “problem,” a desire unfulfilled.
They want something.
You have a product or service that can help them get it. You have a product or service that will help them make that acutely-desired progress toward closing The Gap.
Because your prospects are NOT enlightened beings, they will keep looking for solutions to help them close The Gap.
Your primary role then, in marketing or selling, is to identify The Gap they’re experiencing, really underscore their present experience of The Gap, and then present the solution that will help them close it, or at the very least make real progress toward closing it.
If their experience of The Gap is strong enough, this is pretty much ALL you need to do to knock it out of the park.
(In fact, this is the core goal of the narrative arc in my book, The Ultimate Selling Story, currently available exclusively through Amazon.)
How to exploit The Gap — ethically…
Mmmkay… So here’s the thing. The Gap is extremely powerful.
You can literally push your prospect into feeling an incredible amount of suffering if you exploit it.
That’s kind of what it is.
When someone talks in marketing about how you need to pour salt on the wound, this is basically what they’re telling you to do. I’ve others call it twisting the knife.
Why would you do this? Because it works.
Your prospect pays attention to and engages with these messages because they’re feeling The Gap. They want to close it. They’re looking for that solution, or desired outcome.
And the more you make it crystal clear that you not only understand The Gap they’re experiencing right now… But also understand the suffering and agony that come with their acute experience of The Gap… The more eager they’ll be to jump on whatever it is you offer.
But here’s the thing: effective marketing doesn’t always come with effective solutions.
Make sure that when you show them The Gap, that you’re going to help them close it as well.
If you really can do that though…
That’s when incredible breakthroughs happen.
Yours for bigger breakthroughs,
Roy Furr
